An Easter Awakening
I have been going through some rough times, being attacked personally by someone I once thought a friend, now perceiving me as an enemy, attacking me and defaming me among others, both friends and strangers alike, for reasons unfathomable to me.
I have fought anxiety attacks, depression and as a result, for the first time in a life filled with recurring episodes of despair, even faced down thoughts of a final escape from what is only a temporary problem…I held the full bottle of pills in my hand…wondered if it would be enough…and then set it down again. Closest I ever came to considering taking that final step to find peace.
I think I see the signs of paranoia and dementia in my antagonist, that I saw as my beloved and brilliant father began his descent into that horrible and debilitating disease, but of course have no way of knowing if this man is facing those same challenges or just vindictive for other reasons.
As fate would have it my brother David called me last night and let me vent my troubled heart and mind to him. When I came to the part where I said I suspected the gentleman who is causing all this stress in me might be succumbing as my father did to that demon of a disease, he said:
“Then you must hold him in your heart with love and compassion.”
It hit me like a brick, a good brick. LOL. If you can imagine such a thing.
All the fear, anger, hurt, confusion I was holding dropped suddenly away.
I slept well at last that night, the night of the second blue moon in the new year, now only 3 months along. An extremely rare astronomical occasion and no doubt would have been seen as a remarkable omen to the mystics of yore, who watched the skies, and worshiped the gods they imagined there, and celebrated at this time of year the return of the sun and the rebirth it brings. On a night known as Good Friday to millions the world over I slept like a newborn child.
So awakening on this Easter Weekend Saturday morning I am finding myself at peace again, and wishing you all find your own peace on this holiday weekend, (which I don’t celebrate as the dominant religion does, but yet I do honor in my own way.)
I rose well before dawn and stepped outside to witness the full moon setting directly above the creek behind my home, its ethereal heavenly glow scattered through the hundreds of branches of the trees and the resultant thousands of rays of its rare and beautiful light reflecting in millions of sparkling shining ripples on the flowing water leading up to me standing there in awe as I released George to take his exultant charge full of life down his run along the creek. I smiled at his lack of anything resembling stress, filled with the simple joy of being alive, and let that joy fill me and renew me with my own rebirth of life energy to grow and prosper, as I saw and stood at the head of this mesmerizing, beckoning, shimmering silver path of light leading up to a perfect round beacon of pure white light in the heavens.
Spring. At last. Perfect. Serene.